When closeness leaves too little room for you to be a separate person. In brief An enmeshed mother-daughter relationship is not simply a close one. It is a relationship in which there is too little room for two separate selves. Mom’s feelings, needs, opinions, and...
In Brief Understanding boundaries, attachment, cognitive reframing, nervous-system regulation, medication, and self-care can all help. But knowing what to do may not explain why this relationship still has such power over you. This article argues that healing also...
When a mother’s interference leaves her daughter feeling forced to choose In Brief A daughter's new relationship can shift the emotional balance in an enmeshed mother-daughter relationship. A mother may respond with intrusive questions, criticism, or pressure to...
In Brief When a mother expects immediate access, a daughter may feel guilty, anxious, or selfish when she is unavailable. The Good Daughter may answer, explain, and share personal information to keep Mom emotionally settled, even when that access comes at the cost of...
You leave a therapy session and get into your car. Before you’ve had a chance to think about what you said—what caught you off guard, what felt harder than you expected—your phone lights up. “How did it go?” Sometimes it sounds casual. Sometimes it doesn’t. “What did...
In brief A mother who is jealous or envious of her daughter often becomes most critical at the very moment her daughter is doing well. Instead of uncomplicated pride, the daughter gets a backhanded compliment, a warning, a sarcastic remark, or a reminder of everything...
Good Girl Conditioning in Action When I was nine, I could sense my mom’s bad mood before she even said a word. Her footsteps were heavier, her sighs louder. The air in the house felt sharp, like walking barefoot on broken glass. I didn’t know what had gone wrong that...
At the end of this article- You will be able to tell if you suffer from the long-lasting effects/symptoms of being a daughter of a covert narcissistic mother. Before we get to the symptoms of daughters of covert narcissistic mothers, let's begin with a...
Setting boundaries with your mother sounds great, doesn’t it? And I promise we will get there by the end of this post. As a psychotherapist for over 40 years, and author of The Good Daughter Syndrome®, I know guilt is the number one reason daughters have trouble...